Britney and Madge to do it again Britney and Madge to do it again

By our woman with her fingers in America's dirty laundry, Brianna Banks
A source not at all close to Britney Spears, but who once dated Kevin Federline, has told Utterpants that the popular Pop Princess is planning to outrage her remaining 69 fans by a repeat performance of her infamous live smooch with Madonna — only this time it won't be the dirty diva's tonsils that thrill to the touch of Britney's silver tongue.

"We're talkin' smokin' girl-on-girl action, this time," our source told us breathlessly, as she took time off from defacing a poster of Christina Aguilera. "That skanky slut is gonna get a real pounding!"

An anonymous spokestyperson from the Music industry was only too happy to confirm that live lesbian action was definitely on the menu for Madonna's opening New York show which begins her world tour on Wednesday. "Madge really dug the controversy their last encounter created and it didn't do Britney's career much harm either. Madge's so eager to top the feat that she's offered to buy Britney a whole new leather wardrobe just for this one show."

"Leather?" we asked.
"You don't expect Madonna to be seen on stage with the skanky stuff Britney's been wearing lately, do you?"
"We guess not. So — what will Britney be singing?" we asked.
"She will be singing, won't she?"
"Whatever gave you that idea?"
"Well, if she's not going to sing, why has Madonna invited her to join the show?"
"For the sex, man!"
"Are you sure?"

"Can you think of any other reason why a talented singer at the height of her career would ask a washed-up, slutty lardass with a bad knee and a sprained crotch to appear on stage with her?"
"Not really," we replied.

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Story © 2004 Brianna Banks. Pictures and design © 2004 utterpants.co.uk

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