'Betsy', from Adrian, in the USA, writes:
Sex with a very large woman. You are quite simply put a pig. You are not funny. You are not much of a writer. You are not even in my definition a man. It is a sad thing that not only have you wasted your time in writing this piece of garbage but probably the time of most of your readers. (I am allowing for the fact that there are other immature pigs that might enjoy this piece) You might have also hurt some women's feelings who are less secure than I am about their bodies.
Not apparently secure enough to be able to restrain yourself from frothing at the mouth outrage at an author who had the temerity to make fun of very large women. Perhaps you'd see the joke if you stopped stuffing your face with pasta, burgers and chocolate?

'Des', from Sri Lanka, writes:
Sex with a very large woman. Tell Robert Levin, all he has to do is marry a slim young thing and she'll turn into a huge fat tart before his very eyes. My little bundle of sophisticated joy wears a T-shirts bearing the catchy slogan: 'Once you've shagged fat, there's no going back.'
We suggest you consider cheating on your wife with the previous correspondent.

'James', from the USA, writes:
This poor heroically brave man... if only someone would have but mentioned the wondrous use a small handful of flour can be put to in this exact situation. For those who may find themselves in this situation, you throw the flour at the general area you believe to house the “love tunnel”. Then you look for the wet spot!