Marketing for Girls
Many of our female readers have expressed their bewilderment at the plethora of neologisms used by Marketing executives nowadays. Our intrepid team of wordsmiths and psychologists have left no snake unmilked to bring you the definitive definition of 21st Century Advertising terms

You see a gorgeous bloke at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm amazing in bed." That's Direct Marketing.

You're out shopping for knickers with a bunch of girlfriends and see a gorgeous hunk buying some sexy lingerie. You persuade one of your mates to go up to him and point to you and whisper in his ear: "She's amazing in bed." That's Product Endorsement.

A gorgeous hunk saunters up to you at a party, notices the wedding ring on your left hand, and realises though you may be amazing in bed, he will never know for sure. He's been a victim of False Advertising.

You see a guy at a party that makes your knees shake and your knickers melt. You go up to him and get his mobile number. The next day you call him and say, "Hi, I'm amazing in bed." That's Telemarketing.

You're in a bar and see a gorgeous guy drinking on his own. You hitch up your skirt, fluff your hair and walk up to him and buy him a drink. You drop your handbag and when he stoops down to pick it up, you accidentally brush your lips against his and murmur: "By the way, I'm amazing in bed." That's Public Relations.

You're out walking and a drop-dead gorgeous hunk comes up to you and says straight out: "I hear you're just so amazing in bed." That's Brand Recognition.

Joke written by Ms Givings
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