A woman was very upset that she hadn't had a date or any sex, for nearly eight years. So she went to see her doctor in case there was something seriously wrong with her. He recommended she make an urgent appointment with Dr. Foo King, the internationally renowned Chinese sex therapist.

As soon as she entered his consulting room Dr. Foo King said:
"OK, prease to undress."
She did as he asked but kept her panties on.
"No - take off ALL crose prease."
She took of her panties.
"Now, get down on all fours and crawl werry srowry away flom me."
So, she did.
"OK, werry good. Now crawl werry fass towards me,"
She did.
Dr Foo King sucked in his teeth and said:
"OK. Now kneel in flont of me, put head between legs and rook at me."
"Is this really necessary, doctor?"
"Werry."
She did as he asked.

Dr. Foo King slowly shook his head and said:
"Your probrem werry, werry bad. You haf Ed Zackery Disease. Worse case I ever saw. That why you not haf sex or dates for such long time."
Confused, the woman asked in a trembling voice, "What is 'Ed Zackery' Disease, doctor?"

"It when your face rook ed zackery rike your rarse."