Following the death of a close relative earlier this year, I came into the possession of the personal effects of my illustrious great-grandmother, Dr Clarissa McTaggart, who was a Consultant Gynaecologist at St Thomas' Hospital, in London, until her retirement in 1908, and a leading writer on female sexuality. Among the papers that I inherited, I found several unpublished monographs on such diverse topics as 'The Sexual Life of the Phocidae', 'The phenomena of premature ejaculation as a collorary of Corporal punishment in British Public Schools', and, rather surprisingly, 'The use of Fish oils as an aphrodisiac'.

In the hope that my great grandmother's remarkable work on behalf of women's health may afford some instruction, enlightenment, and possibly amusement, to those of our readers who are interested in the proper upbringing of their female offspring, I have taken the liberty of publishing one of Dr McTaggart's shorter monographs on a subject which is surely dear to every woman's heart: self abuse or female masturbation.

I need hardly add that this is not a subject fit for the ears of those of a delicate or nervous disposition, and must warn my readers that my great-grandmother does not mince her words in her scathing condemnation of a practise which has now become so endemic amongst young girls, that my own daughter has written a shameless guide to it! I shudder to think what Clarissa would have made of today's teenage girls, some as young as thirteen, who shamlessly admit to using electric toothbrushes to indulge in a practise which, to her, was the vilest of sins. Given the wide range of symptoms which Dr McTaggart presents to us as evidence of self abuse, and the precision of her pithy observations, I think it is safe to conclude that, notwithstanding their protestations of innocence, the majority of today's young girls are 'playing with themselves' rather more often than their parents may suspect!

Interestingly, recent medical evidence seems to support many of Dr McTaggart's observations that masturbation may not be as good for us as we have been led to believe. Make no mistake, once you have read Dr McTaggart's list of symptoms you may never again regard lank, greasy hair, zits, a shambling gait, lower back pain, tiredness and irritability in quite the same light!

In preparing this monograph for publication I have omitted my great grandmother's appendix in which she recommends a number of Victorian devices designed to inhibit self abuse in young girls. The most popular of these was apparently known as 'Onan's girdle', and consisted of cushion covered with Japanese silk, into the centre of which a small mesh grating was fixed to shield the genitals from manipulation, whilst still allowing the normal bodily functions to be exercised. Needless to add, this apparatus was, as one might expect, secured by a stout brass padlock! What I found surprising was a hand-written note in the margin of the monograph, apparently written by one Dr J O Pullen of Edinburgh which read:
"In Edinburgh, self abuse has now become so common a practice among young girls and their mothers, who operate not only digitally but with vegetables, that the Prefect has been compelled to issue a stern warning to costermongers not to sell vegetables to unaccompanied ladies or their maids."
No doubt this is where Ms Givings got the idea for her story on 'Stores to ban big vegetables' from. Truth really is stranger than fiction!

It is my sincere hope that this frank and thought-provoking monograph may lead us to question our present attitudes toward this fashionable pastime and ask the important question: 'is masturbation really good for girls?' I leave you to draw your own conclusions!